Tuesday, September 30, 2014

LLL-Session 9

LLL-Session 9: Limits through Time-out

1. Introduction to time-ou

-Many people us time-out without realizing its full potential
-Some ways of using time-out are really effective, some aren’t.
-Time out works best because 1) children feel bad about the disruption in the closenss or wond they want to have with their parents, 2) because they find that every time they misbehave they miss out on opportunities, and 3) because sometimes children need “alone” time to settle themselves down from an agitated state.

-Children who know they are loved want to restore their sense of connection.
-time-out motivates children to learn to control themselves.
-they learn what their parents value


The model for applying time-out:

Situation à Child’s behavior is unacceptable èParent hs child go to time-out and the child is temporarily separated from family relationships à Childs unacceptable behavior decreases.

-time-outs are most effective with kids under the age of 10, when done properly.
-Parents who use time-out need to decide when time-out will be used, where it will occur, and how long.

2. Identifying when Time-out will be Useful.
-too many time-outs are confusing for children
-Once a child knows the rule, few or no warnings should be used

3. Identifying where Time—out will be
-should be a place where the child is not getting attention and the surrounding environment is sterile.
-For older children, it’s best one done in a

4. Identifying how long time-out will last
-One minute for every year of the child’s life—up to five minutes.
-start the timer when the child has stopped crying or having a tantrum.

Helpful Guidelines:
-For children four years and older add one minute to time-out for each minute they refuse to go to time-out, up to ten minutes total time-out
-For each minute the child misbehaves in time-out, one minute is added, up to ten minutes
-if an older child (four years and older) leaves time-out, two minutes are automatically added for each time they leave, up to 10 minutes total time-out.
-Before being allowed out of time-out, the child needs to be quiet and behave appropriately for the last two minutes of time-out.
-If time-out reaches 11 minutes or more, consequences are given or privileges are taken away, Parents need to be judicious when doing this and avoid negative family loops.

5. Implementing Time-out

Demeanor of parents:
-Should be calm, matter-of-fact, and assertive. They should know you mean business.
-Don’t express excess emotions
-Don’t use time-out as a time to lecture or scold them.

Parental togetherness:
-parents need to work together

Explain time-out to child:
-explain what time-out is and how it will be implemented before you actually implement it.

Installing time-out
-the hard part is installing it as a procedure that the children accept
-when starting, pick one or two behaviors that will qualify for time-out

Be prepared for a rough start:
-Plan on having to make multiple attempts
-Allow plenty of time
-Be patient and calm

Let it be over:

-when punishment is over, welcome them back and let them know that you appreciate being with them. 

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